Gareth Southgate's Message on Belief & Resilience: Why Identity, Connection, and Culture Matter

Gareth Southgate’s 2025 Richard Dimbleby Lecture highlights crucial themes that resonate deeply with anyone passionate about men's mental health. His powerful exploration of belief and resilience, particularly among young men, provides a vital prompt for us to consider deeper questions about identity, connection, and culture.

Source: BBC iPlayer

Southgate emphasises resilience isn’t just about enduring adversity but developing a robust inner belief that fuels growth. For young men, resilience enables them to connect deeply with their core values, guiding them toward authentic and meaningful choices in life. This clarity of values reduces fear of failure, helping transform setbacks into valuable opportunities for learning and personal growth, allowing young men to return stronger and wiser.

He also highlights significant dangers facing young men today. Southgate warns about the damaging effects of isolation and loneliness, emphasising how these can erode mental health and resilience. He points to the fear of failure that can paralyse young men, stopping them from taking healthy risks or learning effectively from setbacks. Southgate also critiques cultures that undervalue emotional intelligence, creating environments where emotional struggles remain hidden or misunderstood.

His concerns align with findings from the Centre for Social Justice's 'Lost Boys' report, which he references. The report outlines alarming increases in disengagement, isolation, and mental health issues among young men. It also emphasises how critical identity and meaningful connections are in preventing young men from drifting into feelings of hopelessness, addiction, or deteriorating mental health.

In my practice, I regularly witness how confusion about identity - knowing who you are and what truly matters to you - can erode confidence. I recently worked with one young man who was struggling profoundly with setbacks at work. Through building clarity around his core values, he found the courage to reframe these setbacks as opportunities rather than failures, reshaping his trajectory in the process. Southgate is right: a clear and positive sense of identity is essential, helping young men navigate life's inevitable setbacks with courage and perspective.

Yet identity alone isn't enough. True resilience thrives within meaningful connections. Whether through family, friendships, mentorship, or shared cultural experiences, connection reinforces resilience. Southgate's lecture reminds us of the strength found in community and mutual understanding.

Finally, culture shapes how young men see themselves and their place in the world. A culture that genuinely values vulnerability, honesty, and empathy - not just performance, financial success or toughness - is essential. Southgate’s emphasis on reshaping our societal views of masculinity is critical. Practically, this cultural shift means promoting spaces where emotional honesty and vulnerability are celebrated, enabling young men to feel fully accepted.

To foster resilience effectively, we must prioritise identity, connection, and a supportive culture. When emotional strength is celebrated alongside physical and intellectual strength, young men gain permission to be authentically themselves.

Gareth Southgate’s lecture and the insights from the Centre for Social Justice's 'Lost Boys' report represent an essential call to action for all of us who support and nurture young men.

How are you supporting these pillars in your work or life? I’d love to hear your reflections.